I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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