the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
