Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
