i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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