There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Do vagina's smell?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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