508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
