shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Randomize
