worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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