If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
