he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
i now understand why vodka
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
So vagazzling was a success
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
