it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize