you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
