I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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