i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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