it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
