if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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