i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
