North Korea, Best Korea!
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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