need another drink. this is the easiest way
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
