dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize