It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
i drank out of a bidet.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
