I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
