I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
