Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize