3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
