I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
