So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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