Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
