where am i from again
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
