We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
