I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
