I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
