...so i touched it.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize