why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
