I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
