Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
