Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
