awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize