I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
