Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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