shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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