Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
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