Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
