if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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