there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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