Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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