I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
