And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
