i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
