I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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